We’re all familiar with the scene that’s become somewhat of a cliché: a person taking a picture of their food, a famous site, or themselves without seeming to appreciate the moment or their loved ones around them (children included). There is a drawing that shows a man drowning in the sea, and dozens of spectators holding out their phones to film him rather than help; this tendency in modern times has been exaggerated for comedy’s sake, but it persists and resonates because we know it is sort of true. Phones are whipped out to capture every moment - but truly for what? To remember? To share? To document? Because everyone else is doing the same? Whatever the reason, it seems that we are constantly leaving the enjoyment of the present experience, in pursuit of something else. Children’s birthdays and weddings are possibly the worst victims of hungry photography. When the official wedding photos are shared on Facebook nowadays, the majority of the candid ones are full of people just holding out their phones and smiling at what they see on their screens. Everyone is busy documenting the wedding through a lens. Is anyone simply watching the couple and soaking up the magical moments? When a child is sung happy birthday to at her party, she no longer looks across the candles at a sea of animated, singing faces - but at countless phones pointed at her like paparazzi. It’s really quite sad for both parties: those who are the focus of the cameras but not really seen, and those who are too absorbed in their task to fully live in the moment that will become a memory.
I’m no exception; although I try to be moderate, I relish looking back at photos of special days and normal days, and so I am always ready to take a photo when I think it’s important. In fact, when my phone recently broke, it was the camera I missed more than anything else! But I’m realising that all the documentation in the world isn’t going to replace the experience. Therefore, why would I favour the former over the latter? One example from my own life helped me to partly answer this question - and understand why we love to snap/click away so much. On our honeymoon six years ago my husband and I signed up for a trek on horseback through the hills in Turkey. It sounded so romantic, so exciting - and of course replete with the idea of beautiful memories. The actual experience wasn’t quite as romantic or exciting, but totally hilarious nonetheless. Our horses were a little wild, I was wearing ridiculous flip flops and shorts, it was way too hot and the trek way too long, and when our horses got into the sea we nearly lost control of them. My husband had his phone with him (how?) and managed to take some videos which still make us laugh. But when it was all over, we were relieved - and sore! It was a classic case of the idea (before) and the memory (after) being much more fun than the experience itself. And so I understood why sometimes taking a photo or video can feel more enjoyable than truly just embracing the present. We know that in the future, we will look at the same thing with different eyes. This is a reassuring thought - and opportunity - for us human beings for whom everything is really quite tenuous, fleeting, or imperfect. Perhaps we also simply feel more in control when we have a lens through which to edit life. We eliminate photos that we don’t like of ourselves; we can exaggerate beauty; we can share what we want with who we want rather than face the fact that we are being ‘seen’ in all our facets by people all the time; and we can hold on to things that really, we know in our hearts, we can never actually hold on to. ‘Capturing’ moments makes us feel proud and rich; photos are little trophies of our life and its achievements. And when things are, in reality, not so great - we can still try to create images that suggest otherwise. Not just to convince others, but to convince ourselves. And so, the proliferation of photos in today’s world is totally understandable. What is important is our consciousness: that we are the actors in our lives, not the audience, and that the present is all we really have. If we make ourselves look beautiful or search out experiences in order to immortalise them - then we are on a slippery slope. We can so easily lose touch with our ability to to be free and comfortable in the present, to live and observe and learn in all its child-like splendour, rather than trying to own and retain it all. Just as the child learns that the shining pebble at the beach loses its lustre at home, and the virulent flower in the field wilts and pales in the hand, we might have to re-learn what it means to appreciate the moment for what it is. Even if we can never see it again. Photo by Fox from Pexels
2 Comments
Beckwell
13/8/2019 08:31:00
So very true! I have been thinking about this a lot lately, and just phones in general and how much of my time it takes up just scrolling pages instead of doing something productive with my time or simply reading a book (which can obvs be productive too!)
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Shria
13/8/2019 18:01:19
This is so true!!! Have often thought about this, and see it al around me (and also partake to a certain extent). It's a slippery slope as our attention spans become shorter and shorter with the evolution of these technologies, you're right- we are not taking the time to enjoy the moment, and can often dull down the joy, connection and human contact which is the thing we really need :) Thanks Genevieve. Great piece. xxx
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